Late Night Jokes 22 September 2014
by John | 28th June, 2017
Read the latest of the late night jokes with the greatest comedians of the late night show Jimmy Fallon, Conan O’Brien, David Letterman, Craig Furguson, Jimmy Kimmel and Seth Meyers. Read on to know the reason for why a school in Chicago is named after the President Obama and how the hackers continue to leak the photographs of the celebrity with Jimmy Kimmel.
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon – Late Night Political Joke
There were some major security issues at the White House over the weekend. On Friday, a guy got to the front doors of the White House, and on Saturday another guy jumped over the White House fence. Officials are wondering why it’s so easy to get in, while Obama is wondering why it’s so hard to get out.
Chicago is reversing its plan to name a high school after President Obama after it received multiple complaints from people in the community. I guess parents were afraid their kids would spend eight years at the school and still not get anything done.
There was another round of leaked photos of nude celebrities this weekend, which included Mary-Kate Olsen. Mary-Kate said she was extremely embarrassed. Then her twin sister Ashley said, “Yeah, me too.”
Some sad news from the world of reality TV. Mama June and Sugar Bear from “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” are splitting up. Their lawyers are citing unintelligible differences.
Conan O’Brien – Late Night Political Joke
A man scaled the White House fence and ran across the lawn to the front door. Is it just me or is “The Amazing Race” running out of ideas?
The White House has re-evaluated its security and today they announced they’ll start locking the front door. They’re also going to start asking who’s there when someone knocks.
The CEO of JetBlue announced he’ll step down in February. Of course, it being JetBlue his actual departure may be delayed until March.
In another celebrity photo leak, nude photos of Kim Kardashian have been posted to the Internet. Kim said she’d be very embarrassed if only she knew how.
Late Show with David Letterman – Late Night Political Joke
It’s the first day of fall. The leaves are falling and so is the confidence in Roger Goodell.
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell finally held a press conference on Friday. It was a tough press conference. They carried the guy out on a stretcher.
The situation in the NFL is awful. It’s gotten so bad that even the Redskins want to change the commissioner’s name.
Today was the opening of the U.N. General Assembly. There were 100 representatives from 135 nations in New York City — all here to pay tribute to Derek Jeter.
The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson – Late Night Political Joke
It’s a sad day as we hear that America’s sweethearts — the Honey Boo Boos, Mama June and Sugar Bear — are separating. They’re not consciously uncoupling. That’s for people who eat kale.
Mama June and Sugar Bear are, and I quote, “broked up.” Apparently Mama June caught Sugar Bear cheating with other women. They were Betty Crocker, Mrs. Butterworth, Little Debbie, Sara Lee, and Aunt Jemima.
The Secret Service is under scrutiny after a man jumped a fence and entered the White House. In their defense, when they saw a crazed maniac running down the White House lawn, they assumed it was Biden.
Earlier tonight, there was the new show “Gotham.” It’s about when Batman was a little boy and Robin was a little girl.
Jimmy Kimmel Live – Late Night Political Joke
Today is the first day of fall. But the weather doesn’t change here. The only way we know what season it is in L.A. is by what Paris Hilton’s dog is wearing. Today, cashmere sweater.
It was quite a weekend for Apple. Apple sold a record 10 million new iPhones this weekend, which I think is all of them.
There are no more of the new iPhones. If you didn’t get one, you have to wait for the iPhone 7.
About 400,000 people marched in New York today to draw attention to climate change. They held up signs and banners. They chanted things like “Hey, hey, ho, ho, fossil fuels have got to go.” You know when somebody begins a chant with “Hey, hey, ho, ho,” they mean business.
Late Night With Seth Meyers – Late Night Political Joke
Tonight is our 100th show. We made it to 100 episodes. I want to thank the one group of people we couldn’t have done it without: people who drink coffee late in the afternoon even though they know it’s a bad idea.
The Secret Service is under investigation after two different men made it onto the White House grounds this weekend after jumping the fence. Said President Obama, “Jumping the fence, huh? Why didn’t I think of that?”
The militant group ISIS today released a new audio clip mocking American politicians, including John Kerry and John McCain. And Americans are really upset because they released it directly into everybody’s iTunes account.