Late Night Jokes 16 Septemeber 2014
by John | 28th June, 2017
Read the latest of the late night jokes with the greatest Late night show comedians Jimmy Fallon, Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, Seth Meyers and Craig Furguson. They bring you the best political humor of 2014. Jimmy Fallon has a lot to crack up, bringing you the best from States to Scotland.
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon – Late Night Political Joke
Bill Clinton gave a speech this weekend. He criticized Republicans for spending all their time dissing President Obama. But people from Iowa missed the rest of the speech because they were busy looking up the word “dissing.”
Hillary Clinton also gave a speech in Iowa. She fueled speculation that she’ll run for president when she admitted that she’s “thinking about it.” And next week, she’ll be “thinking about it” when she’s in New Hampshire before she spends a few days “thinking about it” in Florida.
This week Scotland will vote on whether it wants to leave the United Kingdom. If Scotland votes “yes,” it will also leave the European Union and NATO and be responsible for defending itself. Or as Vladimir Putin put it, “I got dibs!”
Of course if Scotland does break up with England, it’ll just do what everyone does: Stalk them on Facebook.
Conan O’Brien – Late Night Political Joke
Last year there was a slight increase in the U.S. prison population. It’s expected to increase even more once the NFL increases to 34 teams.
A group that worships Satan wants to give educational activity books to Florida children. However, officials say it violates two of Florida’s strongest taboos — Satan and education.
Street gangs are toning down their colors in order to be less noticeable to law enforcement. So now there are three gangs walking around in L.A. — the Crips, the Bloods, and the Earth Tones.
The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson – Late Night Political Joke
In New York City today, the 69th version of the United Nations General Assembly was called to order. Manhattan was jammed with traffic, streets were filled with people wearing strange clothes and yelling in every conceivable language. Then the U.N. got started.
The U.N. delegates fan out across Manhattan to take advantage of diplomatic immunity. They do dangerous stuff just because they can, like get speeding tickets. They can even take pictures of Alec Baldwin.
It’s always fun when people who can’t stand each other come together, make speeches, and glare at each other in silent hatred, knowing they won’t have to see each other for a whole year. It’s like international Thanksgiving.
Jimmy Kimmel Live – Late Night Political Joke
On Tuesday, Apple gave the new U2 album to all of their customers for free. It just showed up in their iTunes. People were upset about it. There was so much backlash that Apple released a tool to remove the album from your iPhone. Poor Bono and his weird sunglasses are soaked with tears right now.
The first trailer for the new, highly anticipated “Hunger Games” sequel came out yesterday. Of all the “Hunger Games” movies, they’re saying this is going to be the hungriest.
Paris Hilton has a new dog. But not just any dog. A dog she paid $13,000 for. The breeder that she bought it from named the dog “Mr. Amazing” — I guess because it’s amazing they were able to get somebody to pay $13,000 for a dog.
The reason Mr. Amazing is so expensive is that he’s one of the world’s smallest Pomeranians. For another $4,000, they will sell you no Pomeranian at all.
Late Night With Seth Meyers – Late Night Political Joke
Did everybody get the free U2 album in their iTunes? Well, there were some complaints, so Apple built a webpage specifically for users to delete the album from their accounts. You just enter your birthday, and if you’re under 40 years old it deletes the album.
The White House today came out in support of requiring police officers to wear body cameras at all times. It’s a great way for fans to keep up with their favorite NFL players.
This week scientists at North Carolina State University announced they discovered a way to move and manipulate liquid metal with electricity. And Arnold Schwarzenegger has already been sent back in time to stop it.